prelude v. IV

It's a trail on golden rails
Toward the lasting carbon.
For some this time is going back,
But I won't stop.
This trip is forged by fire.
Fire on fire.
To salt these wounds
And call them out...
To call them in is what,
A fire?

The Alex Show - Episode 55

There is no such thing as a constructive solution.
I just need a destructive distraction.

- afm

down the river

i've been drifting for a moment
the river is my new atonement
i can move without moving
a muscle
there is no struggle
and as all my troubles
float away
i find myself beside myself
so befuddled before
but now i'm restored
the noises have ceased
the chaos no more
there is only the river
a constant giver
delivering the last of me
to a state of peace
far beneath the surface
i deserve this
i proclaimed it
and soon
i will obtain it
so keep me moving
for the remnants are looming

- afm

the white of the light

the sound of the clock tick tick ticking the taste of syrup stick stick sticking to my tongue the room has spun the couch is a twist n spin i twist the paper the paper spins i inhale the lighter i take it in it takes me in bittersweet release such a tease the room's at ease you call that a motif i call it self-righteousness i call you a thief stealing control dealing souls where will mine end up in whose hands if any maybe the bounty was plenty or distributed by twenty regardless i lost the process of thought or so i've been taught to abandon the search so here i perch atop the pedestal they gave me the road they paved me covered in thorns and the cuts were an entry an entry to a world of slavery was this not medicine you gave me or did the light not save me?

- afm

the center

i have drawn out the outlines
but i can't fill in the blanks
the contents spill to the outside
there's no more blood in the bank
i have my conscience to thank

there's an endless canvas of earth
a whitened slate wiped clean
it's no more tainted than birth
yet it won't glisten or gleam
i'm not as pure as i seem

the color of my pallid skin
is colorless
the content of my weary head
is emptiness
but my heart keeps pressing on
long after feeling is gone
my heart keeps pressing on
the rest of me's withdrawn

- afm