The Alex Show - Episode 42

There is always a level of innocence when it comes to curiosity. 

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ALEX: Hi.

_____: Um... hi.

ALEX: How are you?

_____: Can we skip this part?

ALEX: Which part?

_____: The part where we pretend.

ALEX: I'm serious. I just wanted to know how you were - what you've been up to.

_____: I'm fine. I'm always fine.

ALEX: You don't sound fine. You sound... flustered. 

_____: Is there anything you need?

ALEX: Oxygen and fluids, namely. 

_____: Is there anything you need from me?

ALEX: A straight answer would be nice. 

_____: Listen, I can't do this. I mean, I can, but I won't. It's not fair to me. It's not fair to either of us.

ALEX: Well, I'm sorry. I was in a particularly good mood, and it made me wonder if you were in a good mood, too. Not every sporadic call has to be the end result of a bad day or a hopeless feeling. 

_____: Well, those are the calls I'm here for. Everything else can be remitted elsewhere. 

ALEX: I thought you said we would be able to do this one day. 

_____: I used to believe that, I truly did, and maybe one day we shall, but so long as I still... I just can't.

ALEX: Still what?!

_____: Please don't yell at me.

ALEX: I wasn't... I wasn't yelling at you. I was just...

_____: And please don't tell me you were yelling at the situation.

ALEX: Okay. I'm sorry. When then?

_____: When I'm ready. When I can hear your voice without remembering what it used to tell me. When I can see your face without remembering how it used to look upon me. When I can be with you without remembering what it was like to be with you. Then we can try to do this.

ALEX: What are we talking, months? Years? Centuries?!

_____: It's not something that I can measure, Alex! They said I needed time. They said time heals all wounds. I don't want more time. I just want to forget. 

ALEX: They also said repenting for your sins would dismiss them, but I will not repent from loving you. Loving you was never a sin. It cannot be forgiven or forgotten. 

_____: Why do you say things like that to me?

ALEX: What, the truth?

_____: Just because the truth is known doesn't mean it has to be said. For someone who claims to have loved me, you clearly have the opposite intention. 

ALEX: You act like I don't even have a heart.

_____: Probably on account of you acting so heartless. 

ALEX: I still have a heart, _____. I know how to use it, and more importantly, it knows how to use me. 

_____: It knows how to use me, too.

(Click)

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Curiosity killed the cat.

- afm