Monday, December 29, 2008

we're cooler than a cooler

I’m so cool, when i moved to CA earlier this month, the bay area suffered from a cold front for two weeks.

I'm so cool, I swim laps around Antarctica.

I'm so cool, I bought all of my friends coats for Christmas.

I'm cooler than a frozen pool. In a kingdom, I would rule, and slay fools in duels, cuz I'm one step above them like a footstool.

You're so cool, your new nickname is Hailing Hails.

You're so cool, you can freeze time.

Hoodies cannot withstand our coolness.

We’re cooler than the desert at night.

Other people are cool like the winter, but we're cooler than the effin solstice.

We're more kick-ass than a rented mule.

We’re so cool, we're frigid minus the bitch.

We’re cooler than the back of a grocery store.

We’re so cool, we make Santa jealous.

People move to Antarctica just to be half as cool as we are.

We’re so cool, we're glacial. Icebergs ain't got shit on us.

We're cool like Aid and Cool with a K.

We're not only cool, we're pretty fly, too. We're fluttering ice cubes!

We're cooler than ice and smoother than cream.

We're so cool, we keep refrigerated shit fresh.

We're so cool and refreshing, people take us to the desert to stay hydrated.

We're so cool, we don't chatter, we natter.

We're so cool, we keep the polar bears safe from global warming.

We're so cool, we make people sick like cough, cough.

- Alexander McCurdy aka King of Alley Land

3 comments:

Gypsy said...

I'm so cool I have to be measured in kelvins.

Anonymous said...

i’m so cool i have a new nickname
you are so cool your ice cream never melts
we’re so cool the freezemeister is jealous

gah! i’m incredibly fond of being cool (:

~hayley aka hailing hails queen of alley land

Everything Intangible said...

you are magnificently retarded. i love my alesh. and remember, im stingy as a jew with the L word